The Center for Child-Safe Divorce

Home of the Love Before Law™ Movement

Conflicted Co-Parenting Quiz (3 Minutes)

Test your level of conflict to determine if you would benefit from Cooperative Co-Parenting or a Parallel Parenting

Cooperative Parenting

Co-parenting is a cooperative relationship undertaken by parents who intentionally communicate and negotiate with the other parent on how to take on the socialization, care, and upbringing of children for whom they share equal responsibility.

Parallel Parenting

Parallel parenting refers to a method of co-parenting in which each parent has their own parenting approach when the children are with them. Parallel parenting allows for high-conflict co-parents to maintain their collective parenting responsibilities while disconnecting from each other personally.

Help determine your type by taking the quiz below

You/Your child's other parent discuss legal or custodial with/or in the presence of your child or leave paperwork around that they can see *

Always

Sometimes

Never

You/Your child's other parent discuss child support issues with, or in the presence of your children, or leave paperwork around that they can see. *

Always

Sometimes

Never

You/Your child's other parent ask your children to deliver messages or items to the other parent. *

Always

Sometimes

Never

You/Your child's other parent prohibit or inhibit your child from having regular, frequent private communication with the other parent and/or other close family members. *

Always

Sometimes

Never

You/Your child's other parent believe that it is better for the child that both parents stay together despite high-conflict and irreconcilable differences. *

Always

Sometimes

Never

You/Your child's other parent allow family members or friends to make negative comments about the other parent - and/or other close family members - even when out of earshot of the child. *

Always

Sometimes

Never

You/Your child's other parent believe that your children should know why you are separating or what the other parent did to cause the separation. *

Always

Sometimes

Never

You/Your child's other parent have an active or substantiated history of untreated alcoholism, drug abuse or other addictions; and/or physical abuse, verbal abuse or known illegal activity and are NOT in recovery for them. *

Always

Sometimes

Never

You/Your child's other parent use threats of withholding money, or going back to court, in order to attempt to control the children's visitation times. *

Always

Sometimes

Never

You/Your child's other parent allow your child to listen to overhear conversations, voicemails, read texts or emails from the other parent that are intended for adults only. *

Always

Sometimes

Never

You/Your child's other parent believe that your children will be better off if you are the sole caregiver (full physical custody with NO supervised visitation) even if the other parent has not demonstrated any alcohol, drug abuse, physical or mental abuse or illegal activities. *

Always

Sometimes

Never

You/Your child's other parent get upset (and even may try to manipulate your child out of this behavior) when you feel that your children may be favoring or giving the other parent more attention. *

Always

Sometimes

Never

You/Your child's other parent have a new partner and believe it is important to introduce him/her to your child as soon as possible. *

Always

Sometimes

Never

You/Your child's other parent have a new partner and you encourage the children to refer to them as "mommy" or "daddy" even though their other parent is not deceased. *

Always

Sometimes

Never

You/Your child's other parent forbid or puts restrictions or limitations on your child to take their personal items back and forther to each parents' 's house despite whoever purchased them for them. *

Always

Sometimes

Never

You/Your child's other parent prohibit allowing your child to see, and visit, extended family members of the other parent, and vice versa, on a reasonably regular basis. *

Always

Sometimes

Never

You/Your child's other parent ask your children "Who do you love more?" and/or "Who do you want to live with?" *

Always

Sometimes

Never

You/Your child's other parent question your child about visits with the other parent or ask questions about their personal life i.e. "Have you seen daddy with any of his new girlfriends? Is Mommy buying herself any new presents lately with the money I give her?" *

Always

Sometimes

Never

You/Your childs other parent purposely withhold, or don't think it is important to share information about the child's medical appointments, school meetings, report cards, social events, etc. *

Always

Sometimes

Never

You/Your child's other parent tell your children "I can't buy that for you because your mom/dad is not giving me enough money." or "ask your mom/dad to buy that for you because I give them all my money and can't afford it." *

Always

Sometimes

Never

You/Your child's other parent continue to have conflict over unresolved issues that began during the marriage. *

Always

Sometimes

Never

You/Your child's other parent argue/fight over parenting roles and/or techniques and responsibilities. *

Always

Sometimes

Never

You/Your child's other parent (YCOP) claim the child's other parent does not have adequate parenting ability. *

Always

Sometimes

Never

You/Your child's other parent express jealousy to your child about a new partner in the other parent's life. *

Always

Sometimes

Never

You/Your child's other parent demonstrate a history of false allegations about the other parent. *

Always

Sometimes

Never

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